By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

I want to say my introduction to Supergirl was an old back issue with her on the cover, psychotically punching off the head of her own statue, maybe a Superman Family Digest or something. I don’t know, look it up. A cute, blue-eyed blonde that flew around in a skirt and was prone to bipolar rages? Sign me up!

Then, we had the big screen version of Superman’s long-lost cousin in Supergirl, the titular role filled by not-so-super-exciting Helen Slater. The real stars of that movie were Faye Dunaway, as the over-the-top villainess Selena and her henchwoman, Bianca, played by the hilarious Brenda Vacarro. Maybe not the greatest movie, but a camp lover’s dream come true for sure. At any rate, that movie did so well that they killed poor Kara Zor-El off in comic book land.

During the mid ’80s during the continuity-changing mega event Crisis on Infinite Earths, Supergirl died heroically battling the Anti-monitor. In a headband. With a perm. Superman wrapped her in a cape and launched her into space like astronaut poop.

You can’t keep a good blonde down. During his revamp of Superman in the ’80s, John Byrne brought Supergirl back as a shape-shifting lump of pink crap known as “Matrix.” I think she died. (It’s harder to perm protoplasm than you would think!)

Send me an angel. Then, Peter David brought “Supa G” back as a skateboard-riding angel with a lesbian hairdo named Linda. I think she eventually went back to heaven. And then?

Then, Jeph Loeb brought her back as Superman’s long-lost cousin from Krypton. Hey, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. She looked pretty cute, too, in her new Paris Hilton-inspired attire. (Personally, I think they dropped the ball by not having her have a Super Chihuahua!)

Now that DC has hit the reset button and introduced the New 52, what of Supergirl? They introduced her in a new series that is poorly written, poorly drawn, and with a God-awful, anime-influenced outfit. News flash! American comic book fans don’t like anime!

At least cute Supergirl will be besties with cute Batgirl, and cute Wondergirl as part of DC Nation’s Saturday Morning cartoon feature. Any time they wanna bring back the bitchy, statue-bashing teen angster- sign me up, up, and away!

Michael Troy is a deeply superficial person. Born in the midwest in the ’70s, Michael came to Los Angeles to pursue his bi-polar career path as an actor and artist. 2005 saw the release of Michael’s first published book, Homo-Hero’s Big Book of Fun and Adventure (www.greencandypress.com). Michael has contributed to the Lady Gaga comic book from Bluewater Productions and has his hand in various other upcoming projects. Michael has performed stand-up comedy at all of the major comedy clubs in Los Angeles and is making his triumphant return to the main stage of The Comedy Store in September. Michael offers an off-beat sense of humor as the star of such youtube cult classics As The Gays on Film (www.youtube.com/fullfrontaltv), A Minute With Margot, a loving tribute to Superman legend Margot Kidder (http://www.youtube.com/user/rktcommander), and currently hosts a vlog style series Lethally Blonde over at www.monsterburg.com. Sitting alongside industry heavyweight Phil Jimenez at the “Divas and Lassoes” panel for the 2010 San Diego comic-con, Michael maintains and cherishes his “underground” status. A staunch believer in Blonde Ambition, Michael hopes his new comic about shallow blonde super heroes in Los Angeles, The Blonde Squad, will set the world on fire (or at least brighten it a bit). Check out Michael Troy and Lethally Blonde updates here!!!