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Featured Series

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

Put your trays in the upright position and prepare for landing. Although it hasn't been exactly smooth sailing for ABC's nighttime soap about Barbies in the sky, it has gotten better with each episode, and this week proves to be no exception, as we finally delve into the background of my favorite stewardess, Maggie (portrayed by the always fabulous Christina Ricci).

As much as I cared for the feisty, pint-sized pixie with a bit of a mouth on her, there seemed to be something a little manufactured and forced about the character and now we know why. It seems Maggie doesn't officially meet up to Pan Am's strict policies of Stepford perfection. She's a fraud. A fake. She doesn't even speak Portuguese for the love of Cuban Pete! She learned it from her tyrannical Portuguese boss as- gasp! A waitress! Not that there's anything wrong with that. I come from a long line of proud hash slingers.

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

Mr. Spock is gay. Sort of, but not really. So, Zachary Quinto (Heroes), who played Mr. Spock in J. J. Abrams' genius re-imagining of the Star Trek franchise, is gay. Yuh huh. He came out of the closet. To be honest, for me, he fell under that category of celebrities that seemed obviously gay to me and shocked everyone else. You know, like Ricky Martin or Rosie O'Donnell.

Being the big Zen/Queen that I am, I'm all about balance and ying and yang and all that bull crap, but I've never understood why so many actors stay in the closet and who these headless people are that think they are straight. I understand to an extent. Breeders- er, straight people, rather- do have a ways to go before completely accepting the homosexual population. I suppose I would be less bitter if I didn't live in a state where "gay marriage" was legal for five minutes. A woman's right to vote should go by the wayside next, don'tcha think? Absurd? Yes. Any who, I think actors are afraid to be pigeonholed if they come out. Zach came out and immediately broke the mold by playing a neurotic, gay interior designer on my new favorite show on FX, American Horror Story. Way to break the mold, Zachy baby. I lost plenty of roles I was born to play to straight actors. Once again, not bitter.

I wondered how Trekkies felt about homosexuality, and it would make sense that forward thinking wouldn't even call it to your attention in Star Trek land. In the future, dare I say it.. might there even be a "cure" for homosexuality? (Gasp!) Which brings me to my next point...

Homosexuality is logical. A good friend of mine said his father viewed it as nature's way of population control. Duh. That always made so much sense to me. If we can't overpopulate this mud ball, at least we can decorate it.

First Sulu, now Spock? The future is teeming with fairies. Beam me up!!!

I think higher-profile actors like Zach Quinto and Neil Patrick Harris (Doogie Howser, Jr. Gynecologist has a terrible ring to it!) coming out is a good thing. I hope this paves the way and inspires others to be brave and proud of who they are! Yes, Richard Simmons, I'm talking to you.

P.S. I'm gay.

 

 

 


 

 

Michael Troy is a deeply superficial person. Born in the midwest in the '70s, Michael came to Los Angeles to pursue his bi-polar career path as an actor and artist. 2005 saw the release of Michael's first published book, Homo-Hero's Big Book of Fun and Adventure (www.greencandypress.com). Michael has contributed to the Lady Gaga comic book from Bluewater Productions and has his hand in various other upcoming projects. Michael has performed stand-up comedy at all of the major comedy clubs in Los Angeles and is making his triumphant return to the main stage of The Comedy Store in September. Michael offers an off-beat sense of humor as the star of such youtube cult classics As The Gays on Film (www.youtube.com/fullfrontaltv), A Minute With Margot, a loving tribute to Superman legend Margot Kidder (http://www.youtube.com/user/rktcommander), and currently hosts a vlog style series Lethally Blonde over at www.monsterburg.com. Sitting alongside industry heavyweight Phil Jimenez at the "Divas and Lassoes" panel for the 2010 San Diego comic-con, Michael maintains and cherishes his "underground" status. A staunch believer in Blonde Ambition, Michael hopes his new comic about shallow blonde super heroes in Los Angeles, The Blonde Squad, will set the world on fire (or at least brighten it a bit). Check out Michael Troy and Lethally Blonde updates here!!!

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

Come listen to a story about a man named Jed, poor mountaineer barely kept his family fed. Then, one day, he was shootin' for some food, and up from the ground came a bubblin' crude... oil that is. Black gold. Texas tea. Well, next thing you know, old Jed's a millionaire. Is that the theme to the Real Housewives of Beverly Hillbillies? Not hardly. I think if old Jed had been warned about the Harpies of Beverly Hills, he and his kinfolk may have happily stayed in the Ozarks, pooping in a broom closet in the back yard.

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

Picture it: Harlem, 1973, a beautiful, young African-Americanw oman bursts onto the scene to fight crime. Daughter of a young junkie prostitute that was beaten and raped by a pimp, the girl wished to escape the torment and vindicate the harsh treatment she and other women like her faced in the socially changing times. In a time of women's lib and civil rights, the country needs a strong black woman to use her Afro of truth and fight for justice and the African-American way. It's a word, it's a plan, it's... Wonder Sister? Not so much? This may be how Wonder Woman could have been done in the '70s by the socially conscious Denny O'Neil and Neal Adams. Their Green Lantern and Green Arrow run was, and still is, legendary. I believe it was the 1st time a sidekick (Speedy) was turned into a junkie. You never saw Robin free-basing in the Bat cave after all. Sweet Christmas? I know, right?

Once Upon a Time

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

As if Sunday nights couldn't get any gayer, with Pan Am's "Barbies in the sky" and the cougar mausoleum of Desperate House hags, ABC adds another "fairy tale" with Once Upon a Time to its line up. A novel idea, Once Upon a Time is about fairy tale characters, if they were real. Snow White's Evil Queen Mother puts a curse on all the fairy tale characters, banishing them to the fictional Storybrooke, sans any knowledge of who they really are.

THIS AIN'T NO TOY STORY...

Shelf Life is an irreverent new live-action web series about four action figures perched on a young boy's shelf.  In its hilarious first season, Shelf Life will introduce audiences to Hero Man (Travis Willingham: Thor, Transformers, Marvel Super Hero Squad), Hero Lass (Tara Platt: The Gilmore Girls, Charmed, Afterworld), Bug Boy (Yuri Lowenthal: Terminator: TSCC, Ben 10: Alien Force, Legion of Superheroes), and Samurai Snake (Bryan Enk), as they wax poetic on a range of hot-button topics.  This R-rated series leaves no controversial topic untouched and no curse word unused!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Disclaimer: Please note that this web series is for mature viewers only, as it contains strong language and adult content.)

 

 

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

Any good fanboy knows that hardcore fans of Marvel Comics proudly refer to themselves as Marvel Zombies. In the spirit of the holiday - yes, I'm referring to Halloween (it's almost holy here in West Hollywood) - I proudly proclaim, "I am a Pan Am Zombie!" (Speaking of zombies, I hardly think it's fair that Pan Am is up against AMC's The Walking Dead. I mean, that is some stiff competition.  ABC should seriously think of trying a new time slot to give Pan Am a fair shake.)

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

I was a little harsh in my review of DC's Nu 52 direction for Wonder Woman. Okay, way harsh. Maybe I was having my period. Just one of those days; don't take it personal. I'm not always like this. Enough with the menstrual jokes, I promise! It's just hard to resist when reviewing Wonder Woman.

The good news is all is forgiven. In Issue #2 of the new Wonder Woman, Queen Hippolyta is revealed and she is blonde! All of my prayers have been answered. As much as I love George Perez (and, I love me some George Perez!), it always chapped my ass that he gave Hippo a raven Jheri curl post-Crisis on Infinite Earths. I know it makes more sense to have a "which one is the daughter, which one is the mother" moment, but I have a soft spot in my heart for platinum-tressed divas, being of the blonde tribe myself. (What can I tell you, I was born this way!)

 

*Spoilers, bitches!*

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

Hot on the heels of more seemingly endless bad publicity (her crystal choppers being all the rage last week), Lindsay Lohan is back in the slammer again. For a probation violation this time. And, Bluewater Productions couldn't be happier. Their Lindsay Lohan bio-comic was released the same day "Two-toot Sally" went back in the slammer again. You just can't pay for publicity like that. I should know, as I'm the biggest publicity whore in the tri-state area, and it IS hard out there for a pimp. Sure, she'll be free by the time you read this, as her justice system seems to have a revolving door. But, just for the fun of it, let's pretend she is shackled to some super affectionate woman with "Bertha" somewhere in her nickname, shall we?

By Michael Fitzgerald Troy

 

In my humble opinion, ABC's Pan Am is one of the best shows on TV. I had my fears in the beginning that it may be more style over substance - not that there's anything wrong with that.

A little short on character in the pilot (the 1st episode, not the hunky blonde commanding the 333,600 lb. bucket of bolts), subsequent episodes have shown character and story development, and this week is no exception, as the girls' flight is rerouted to the Orient, forcing them into all kinds of toil and trouble.

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