It’s said that we look back on the past with rose-colored glasses; I’m not entirely sure what that is supposed to mean, but those would have turned the subject of this article purple, so that’s fun. I’m always quick to tell people that I was actually a fan of the time Superman turned into a bright blue energy dude, but that was fifteen years ago. Lately, it’s been coming up a lot, so I thought I would put my money where my mouth is by sitting down with 11-year-old me and re-reading all of my comics featuring “Superman Blue.” Also, the red one. How did it hold up? What new discoveries were made? How is this even possible? Read on.
(For those of you who are fussy about details, the issues I read are: The Adventures of Superman #545-6, 555; Action Comics #732,742; Superman: Man of Steel #67, 77; Superman #123, 132; Superman Red/Superman Blue #1; and JLA: Secret Files and Origins #1)
He floats by the fountain in the desolate park, waiting. His allies are gone, systematically taken out . . . it all happened so fast. First, the young man in the alien suit who called himself Spider-Man, followed by Aztek, the Ultimate Man. Thrown together by fate, they were not destined to fight together for long. No, now it is only Superman. Silently, he curses these strange new energy-based abilities. If he had his old, familiar powers, perhaps, he could have saved them . . . perhaps he would have stood a chance. Perhaps.
As a geek with over a quarter-century of experience in experiencing the last quarter century, I have seen my fair share of supervillainy. Whether of the Saturday morning cartoon “world domination” variety, or the more nuanced evil scheming in more “adult” films [but not that kind of “adult,” as that would be weird (though highly watchable, now that I think about it…I mean, I’d watch it)], supervillains and masterminds of all kind perpetually frustrate me. Maybe I’m in the minority, but I often find myself rooting for the bad guys. Not completely, of course, I’m not a monster, but sometimes I just want to see what would happen if their devious plan actually succeeded. Perhaps, I’m just tired of watching them suffer defeat after defeat at the hands of their respective heroes, and seemingly never learning anything from the affair. Well, all you evil schemers and would-be dictators, I am here to help---I am here to offer you the wisdom I have gleaned from witnessing your countless embarrassing defeats.
For those of you in the know, my last article was a shocking exposé on the link between vaccines and autism, wherein all of my collated data irrefutably proved---oh, wait. This is for Fanboy Comics…ok, right, then, my last article was If Superheroes Were More Realistic. I was recently reprimanded by a reader for not including any Marvel characters, but I assure you, I had my reasons:
1. I’m not as knowledgeable about the Marvel universe.
2. Marvel is already so much about covering all of the minutiae and the petty, everyday issues that their characters are faced with.
However, since I’ve never been someone who let my own ignorance or a simple numbered list keep me from running my mouth, I present the article that at least one of you has been waiting for: If Superheroes Were More Realistic---The Marvel Edition.
I recently acquired all four boxed sets of Batman: The Animated Series at a yard sale for $20. (It’s ok to be jealous.) Needless to say, I have since been watching the crap out of those DVDs. I’m sure most of you remember the show, but if you’re like me, you haven’t seen it since you were a kid. Well, I’m here to tell you that the show is just as good as you remember; nay, better. In fact, I come to you today with a bold proclamation: that the animated series version of Batman is the best version of Batman there is, and if you disagree, you are wrong.
I should probably mention up front that I don’t fully understand how arguments work.
Disclaimer: I will be comparing animated Batman to the more current and popular interpretations of Batman, since I shouldn’t have to explain why Adam West’s Batman or the Batman from Batman and Robin aren’t as cool. You should have no problem accepting that.
Superheroes are our modern-day myths, “living” legends of immense power whose exploits thrill and inspire us. In the midst of all this hero worship, though, it’s easy to forget that beneath the masks and the emblems is a real human/human-like alien/mutant with real thoughts and feelings. I say this, not as a reminder of the human frailties and emotional vulnerabilities that these living gods must deal with in private moments, but more to point out that these figures are not so different from you or me---which is why they should be screwing up much more often in stupid and embarrassing ways. Perhaps, in situations like these:
While furthering our knowledge of the origin and nature of theoretical physics, physicist Stephen Hawking has become one of the most vital scientific minds since Albert Einstein. Hawking has accomplished revolutionary work on the existence of black holes and published multiple best-selling books on his scientific discoveries over the past 40 years. Overcoming great professional and personal obstacles such as his battle with Lou Gehrig’s disease (ALS), Hawking earned legendary status among his fellow physicists with his notable endeavor to understand the universe. With his most successful book, A Brief History of Time, he explained the evolution of his thinking about the cosmos for general audiences, earning him status as an accessible genius and a household name. Hardly slowed by his battle with ALS, Hawking has continued his research into theoretical physics, written another book, and traveled the globe giving lectures to the general public.
Hey Howdy, my lil' Fanboys and girls! J.C. here and, with Con season getting under way, I thought I might give you the fun-down-run-down about being prepared and staying safe at your favorite Con! I myself am looking forward to attending the upcoming Tekkoshocon in Pittsburgh, but this info can apply to any Con anywhere. (Except space. Space Con is dangerous and takes years to mentally prepare.) Even if you're an experienced attendee, it's good to brush up on some of the particulars, and I'll have you going from Baka to Sempei in no time.
Cooking Mama Says: Just Like Making Souffle, Preparation is Key.
OK, so, you bought your ticket, booked your hotel (if needed), and you're ready to go, right? Wrong! You gotta plan. Luke didn't just hop into an X-Wing and roll out guns a-blazing, did he? No. That would have been an Anakin move, and we all know how well that turned out. So, here are a few tips to get your prepared for Battle Royale.